Monday, March 30, 2009

Weird, bro!


I wanted to write a big, long blog about how the Night of Weirds is the best night Miami has to offer. To say how I love everything about it and everyone that attends. That it keeps alive all that is good about being a strange, smart human being. That it's like going home. 
Unfortunately I'm missing tomorrow's display of weirdness and I can't truly express my affection for this night because of exhaustion and laziness. Instead, I'm posting this subpar message in support, just to say this is the best of Miami. Have fun!

Wow, whatever, bro.

After my eventful Friday night, I definitely thought twice about leaving my bedroom on Saturday. But I got about 10 hours of sleep and couldn't continue to lie there much longer, so I got up and went out.

Not that anyone cares about the details, but I helped my friend and neighbor pack for a NY move, then I took about three hours to get dressed and make myself presentable. Horribly enough, even after those hours of contemplation, there was a girl out wearing, and I quote my friend Meatball here, "the same color scheme" as I was. Downer.

I tried to catch the end of the Matt and Kim show, but I missed it. Everyone there was very young, like really cute, tiny and infantile. Feeling like a dinosaur, I shuffled over to O.H.W.O.W. which my friend referred to as something like, "Oh, wow. This sucks." The two other times I've been to the space, for Confection and during Basel, I was mostly impressed. However, I think WMC can ruin just about anything, this being proof.

I waited for 40 minutes for a warm beer. The lonely and busy bartendress was bombarded with people hungry for drink, like myself. I've noticed no one ever tips these art opening beer-slingers. Give em a buck, you cheap bastards.

The photography was forgettable, and after the gallery was closed, the other room turned into a sauna-like rave area, dark and uninviting. Where the Black Lips show was sweaty and fun, this was just sweaty and borderline frightening. Someone else referred to it as resembling a high school party, and I added, minus the perks of a cold keg.

I swung by the newest Wynwood party place, the Awarehouse. I know there was a busy opening there a few weeks back, but it was pretty quiet when we arrived. The space is really large and airy, with both inside and outside areas. It's reminiscent of the old Ice Palace where NADA has it's annual art fair (across from PS14). It think that it'll be used well during Basel.

Lastly, I would like to brag about what a do-gooder I am. Tomorrow I'm heading up to Tallahassee to lobby our state legislators to expand medicaid/Kidcare, protect immigrants, remove ridiculous tax exemptions and other such well intentioned stances to money/access issues. If you want to give money to support me and the others, click here. I'm excited to volunteer, but dreading the bus ride up. Yes. The bus. The mere thought fills me with dread. Hopefully it will be a fruitful journey and I'll have loads to report back.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Black Lips and Mt. Sinai, bro

As you can see, I went to the Black Lips show at Churchill's. And though the show was fun, it wasn't the ultimate highlight of my evening, which was watching victims of the WMC at Mt. Sinai's ER. But I'll get to that in a minute. 

This is the third time I've seen Black Lips perform, both other times were in '06 in NY. First time, they opened at Roseland for the Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs and it was, ok, sort of forgettable, as was the YYY's show (boring). The second time they opened for Be Your Own Pet at Bowery Ballroom, and that was a great performance. They were more raw then. They didn't piss on the crowd, as they were known for doing in the past, but two of them smooched and there was some
 
spitting and other fun stage antics. That night though, we didn't even stay for the opening act, because a guy from the Canadian band Demon's Claws opened fire on the crowd with a fire extinguisher. Freaking Canadians, I love you.

Miami's own Jacuzzi Boys opened last night with a new band member who looked like the Muppet Swedish Chef but was wearing an ensemble dangerously similar to my own (pictured above). Churchill's was packed to the brim. Luckily it was cool outside, because otherwise, I think we all would have melted. Surprisingly, the audience was moderately sane, and although some kids were jumping off the stage at the end of the Black Lips set, during the "appropriately named" song, "Bad Kids," there wasn't any major crowd damage.   

I have to say, Black Lips is the cutest band out there. I mean, they're adorable and under 25. The one is gay, I think, as he kisses boys and said on stage last night, "I don't dig girls" (that's an indicator). The music, although an obvious revival of garage of days past, stands on its own, with lyrics that address a contemporary audience of youngsters. I give em a 4 out of 5.

I had a good time. Front row, I sweat through my dress and my hair - very unattractive. In typical Miami, bro style, I wanted a picture with my favorite little black lip, and he was more than kind about obliging (in your face Matt Damon). He even indulged me with a compliment and a staged picture (below - don't judge me. I was sweaty, not greasy, I swear).  

After the show, as we ladies were leaving, my friend suddenly felt ill and passed the fuck out. She hit the band's van and then the gravel, and luckily one of the roadies, who looked a little too clean cut, helped her into my car. I have to say, the whole crew of them were compassionate as my girls rushed to the aid of my lightheaded friend. In order to avoid the fright of the Jackson emergency room, I rushed my friend over to Mt. Sinai, which is a pretty clean, quiet place. 

However, there, we did experience a creepy shirtless man, also parked on a nearby gurney, who happened to take a liking to us. In a low voice, he made lewd remarks about our anatomy and blew us pervy kisses. There was an out-of-towner who had been hit on the head with a champagne bottle and who had enjoyed the delights of ecstasy. He started a fight with his friend, on site, classy dude. Another lovely specimen strolled by in a tiny leopard print dress, big hair and --- bare feet! There's nothing more repulsive than bare feet on South Beach or bare feet on a hospital floor except for someone's feet who have experienced both. 

The nurses there were really nice, if you happen to pass out outside of Churchill's, I'd recommend Mt. Sinai. All in all, an eventful night. 





Wednesday, March 25, 2009

WMC Stuff. Don't be overwhelmed, bro.

So, these flyers are tiny... I guess I'll just tell ya what's on there. Tonight, go by The Standard and check out Panic Bomber 8-midnight. Matt and Kim will perform Saturday at the Upper East Side Garden, 6-11. After that, Otto, Jose El Rey and others will be performing at PS14, Miami Zoo. Poplife has a Saturday party at White Room.

Rokbar has an interesting lineup: Thursday is a Poplife event with A-Trak, Macy Grey and Junior Sanchez on Friday (WTF? What am I missing here?), and on Saturday, Cut Copy, The Presets and Tommie Sunshine - sounds kinda like a great party. 

Have fun, don't act too much like a-holes and avoid the eurotrash. 







If you have good taste in jewelry and a feminine spirit...


Come by and see Senufa's show at Transit Lounge (729 S.W. 1st Ave.) on Saturday, from 7-10.

There's some other stuff going on there too:
SWAN spoken soul showcase volume 2inspired by the Fund for Women Artists
With spoken word, art, photography, fashion and music, FREE admission - silent auction.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Fox's and Abel?

I know the flyer's too small to read, but go by Fox's tonight. It's 2 for 1 after 11 and Abel has some sort of musical plans for the night. 

Friday, March 20, 2009

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Art is so cool, bro. But like for real though.

This Saturday at FIU South, in their newish music hall, there will be a multimedia presentation featuring recordings of sea sounds by some dude and stop motion animation by Venessa Monokian. It starts at 8, it's free. No excuses. 

There's an opening at MOCA on the 25th, featuring work by Jen Stark and a bunch of other people you've heard of. Click here for info. 

For other local art events, check out Artlurker

Anyone out there who really, really loves inanimate objects?


Watch Married To The Eiffel Tower [Part 1] in Entertainment  |  View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

Thanks for sharing, Nathan!

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Happy St. Patty's Day!

Be like 1/8th of me and get stupid in celebration of your Irishness tonight. Toast one for my Murray ancestors.
The Gables will be the grossest yet most appropriate outpost for people attempting to express their Irish side (this side either is frighteningly pasty or sunburnt/drinks to fight or passes out on the street/wears embarrassing green garb).
On the menu:
Irish car bomb
Jameson shots
Green beer

This year, I'm posting a four leaf clover because good luck is rare and I think we all need a little right now.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Calle, bro

I ate some pan con lechon at Calle Ocho, checked out fancy ghetto wear for the churns, watched Jose el Rey perform with Debbie of Avenue D and then wandered back to my friends' house and passed the hell out. Like a bag of bricks. That's my story. Not a lot to it. But the sandwich was outta control. Out-ta control delicious. 


Friday, March 13, 2009

Why is the media never accountable? Why don't people think?


NY Times article - pretty entertaining.

Jim Cramer from CNBC's Mad Money has been showing up on Comedy Central quite a bit lately. I saw him the other night on The Colbert Report, where my hero merely mocked him with images of kittens and puppies flashing behind his bald skull. Jon Stewart took a much more aggressive approach to Cramer and CNBC's coverage of the crashing markets, mostly in being irresponsible, giving poor advice and misinformation, encouraging this current crisis. You can watch the interview at The Daily Show.

I don't want to comment on the media's manipulation of markets as much as the market's allowance of this manipulation. I've been contemplating writing a counter argument to the women-body image-media claims that bulimia is a product of television, at that sort of body image stuff. I don't entirely buy it, won't get into it now. However, I do think that that the mainstream media does its best to attempt to fill the public's heads with misinformation. Fine. That's the role of the media, sell ideas, sell airtime, sell, sell, sell. What fascinates me though, is that the public goes for it.  

In this case, it was important that CNBC should have acted as a mouthpiece for the "market" in favor of the viewers, which it didn't do. I can't agree with Stewart more. Stewart mentions that CNBC doesn't have to be a watchdog for the industry, but the message is that it should uphold a level of integrity and accountability, not tricking viewers into bad financial decisions, etc. 

What is terribly tragic that that Jon freaking Stewart, host of Comedy Central's The Daily Show is the most high-profile character acting as a media watchdog. Comedy Central. The media should have the viewership's best interest in mind, especially in this case, where such large sums of money are at stake.

It's no surprise that cable television or any media, for that matter, cannot be trusted. I think that anyone who encounters any periodical and believes entirely what they are reading or watching or hearing is a sad, mindless creature. Please, if you are one of them, take what I said personally, it's not "not about you" it is about you. You are the one who decides to believe or not. If you are bright and questioning, you will understand that even NPR is wrong sometimes. 

A little more than six years back, I was a very active anti-war, or peace, activist. Although I grew up in an environment that fostered creative thinking, and I always knew about liberal media to a certain extent, I think that my experience with the anti-war movement, as anorexic as it was locally, really pulled into perspective for me the level of false information out there. The "movement" in Miami was me and a handful of older, brilliant gentleman crusaders. There were other groups around town, but ours was the most inclusive and planned the biggest rallies by the Freedom Tower. The network of these people helped give solid reference and facts to support my paranoid, but correct instincts. However, I didn't need a network of well informed individuals to hint that maybe the TV wasn't telling the truth all the time.

I have seen people's perspectives broaden since we invaded Iraq. More young people have gotten involved. What horrifies me is that they weren't involved before, when it fucking mattered. Before we killed almost 100,000 Iraqis. Before they reelected Bush. Now we're all in the shitter economically, and I feel like you all deserve it, but I don't. I just can't imagine feeling any pity for the Americans who can't even think creatively enough to reject whatever the media spews at them. I mean, if you don't understand the stock market/big business/big brother, make some smart friends whom you can trust. If you can't trust anyone, move to a remote farm and don't invest. People, think and then act after you've thought.