Berlin/London: Politics

This is the victory column where Barack Obama spoke this July, in front of a crowd of 200,000. And this is where JFK gave one of his most famous speeches in Rathaus Schöneberg, down the street from where we were staying.


Here's a few funnies to enjoy!

London 2: Party, Night 1

After tea at Harrods, we napped and then went out on the town. 

In London, you don't tip the 

bartender, so they have no reason to be heavy handed 

with the booze, and in fact, at most places, the shot glasses are this big <----. Pathetic. Anyway, we started at George and Dragon and then stopped into Favela Chic, both in the trendy 

Shoreditch area, which has a variety of  types and shapes of partiers.

Favela Chic reminded me of a friendlier South Beach club but George and Dragon is what the best East Village, semi-gay, grimy, chilled out dream bar wished it could be. In other words, the atmosphere was relaxed, the people were friendly, the drinks affordable, the people cool, and not pretentious. It was gay heavy, but very diverse as well. The bar is small and most people spill out onto the street, but is filled with entertaining eye-kitsch, like this Cher likeness, seen

 above. The DJ was rocking out the good old TLC and Dolly Parton, and we spoke with him after his set. Turns out he's the guy that used to throw the, now defunct but well known, Boom Box parties. He was friendly enough wanted us to keep in touch. We were talking music for a bit, but when I asked him if he had heard of Girl Talk (as this type of music came up), he acted like I thought up some nobody, Hialeah, wannabe DJ who played bar mitzvahs, like I was crazy to mention such an unknown "Miami" person. No offense, but often people that "throw" parties tend to be insecure and project false confidence. Just chill out guys, there's nothing wrong with just being yourselves. Anyway, one of the bartenders, who was adorable, told us about this party at a parking lot warehouse across town with "great" DJs. This basically translates from European to American to something terribly trancey. We went anyway, and here's Eddie being a goof with some dude who lent him his glowing glasses, obviously left over from a late 90s rave. It was really organized and had an actual bar, two areas with DJs and neat graphics on the walls. There were a bunch of kids there as is evidenced below. Next day we were off to Berlin! 

upcoming

Hey there, Miami. I am back in town after a wonderful vacation in London and Berlin. I found some gems that I want to share with you all, in case you head across the pond and need advice. I am considering starting right now, but last night I danced like a dork for hours and attempted to show up this girl who was doing one-armed push-ups at this club, but I could only do a few them with both my arms. This is possibly because I had been drinking for eleven hours straight and had little balance, as well as limited movement from my tight Opening Ceremony, birthday dress. Every muscle hurts and is angry with me. Let's just say I'll start tomorrow.

Cheers!

London 1: Harrods - Afternoon Tea and Many Muslims

I had afternoon tea in the Georgian Restaurant in Harrods last weekend. Appropriately, the inside is decorated in the Georgian style, however, we opted to sit on the terrace which was really lovely and bright. The tea was pricey, but worth it for the Harrods experience. This experience includes the intoxicatingly delicious raisin scones with clotted cream (seen below) and an inordinate number of wealthy Muslim ladies who were binge shopping. I'm part Lebanese, though not Muslim (go Maronites!), so I can say whatever I want about my own people. Harrods is owned my Mohamed Al-Fayed, an Egyptian whose son died with Princess Diana. I guess he's doing a great job marketing to his people, because there were more 'rabs in Harrods than in Dubai. They're rich as shit and I really don't understand how many $3,000 purses and $500 pairs of underwear you can actually buy. All they wear are black drapes, so you know they're not getting DVF dresses. Every time I see one, I just want to take their credit card and What Not to Wear on them. However, there were some lovely Arabs with style. If you'll notice, my favorite swathed lady can be seen in the background, below the clotted raisin heaven. She's talking to the ugly version of Carson from Queer Eye, who we couldn't stop laughing about. It was a good scene.

mmmm....

Mufasa Month, Bro

I am a Leo, and every August I take a vacation and I get the hell out of town. This year, I'll be on holiday (as Eddie says) twice: New York this weekend, and London and Berlin the following Friday, for a week. This means that if you want to do wrong by me, wanna tongue an ex of mine in plain, public view, or talk a ton of trash about how lame I am, these will be the times to do so. Of course Miami, bro needs a break from the Miami-life. Miami, bro can, and will travel, and then tell you all about it. Just because, bro. Why the fuck not? I'll be Chilling in NY, bro and then Straight Chilling in London, bro, and finally, Fucking Chilling the Fuck Out in Berlin, bro.

You know how it is.