Saturday, November 22, 2008

Guest Blogger: From Miami to London, Crystal.

I've asked my best friend and "UK Correspondent" to write about his recent jaunt at a London hotspot: Crystal. The reason we agreed this would work is because we have a club Crystal, right here, in Miami. I heard about his crazy evening overseas, and I thought, we need people in Miami to know that there is a very different club by the same name on the other side of the pond. Here it goes. 

Before I begin, I should give you a little background about myself.  

Londonbro and Miamibro go way back. How back? Back to the middle-school days of bagged lunches and sitting in a small enclosed concrete patio, not fitting in. Some years later, Miamibro and Londonbro scammed and plotted to get into some of the best clubs on South Beach (when South Beach was still cool and you had more of a chance of running into Madonna than some chicks from Atlanta). Nineteen, pretending to be 21, jumping a red rope when no one noticed, jumping in with a big group of well-connected people so that you blended in as one of their large crowd. 

So now, we're mostly grown up and the only thing that's changed is that we don't live in the same city, but the love for a good time and nightlife still remains. Also, Londonbro is gay. Gay nightlife in my new home of London is accepting, vast, and diverse, which is very unlike my former home of NYC. In NYC, it's geeky boys to the right, muscle boys to the left, posh boys this way, trendsters that way. Although I prefer gay clubs, as someone who puts bread on the table through a job in finance, I have no shame partying with my straight, fellow bankers. 

Typically in a suit straight from the office, going out has a simple formula: get as many women as possible to hang with you, overpay for a table in the main room, and then, you're in! Once you get a table, order a magnum bottle of champagne, have the sparklers and fireworks that come with getting it so that all eyes focus on your table, and then laugh and drink it up! 

Sometimes it's hard to take something seriously when you have a past association. In this case, it's Crystal. Crystal, you may say, that's that club on 5th street where my old co-worker from Richmond Heights loved going to! And in turn, I would say – not Crystal in Miami, but Crystal in London! Now, I don't know about you, but I love when life plays a little joke. It's as if all of my life I've been running and building up only to come back to the places where I started. I may have been partying at Crystal in London, but you see, this Crystal had no one of African descent, it only had Russians. You see, over-the-top nightlife in London is dominated by what I never knew growing up in Miami. Namely, millions of super rich kids from places like Moscow, Mumbai (or is it Bombay) and Abu Dhabi, partying the night away. Most of the partying takes place in London because it's annoying to go ALL the way across the Atlantic when you can one-up each other right close to home. 

London Crystal has some of the best lighting I've seen – tastefully changing soft hues, shining through what seems like a curtain of semi-cut champagne flutes, hanging from the ceiling. The sexier women are all in skinny jeans, tight cotton underwear-like tank tops (it's almost winter here), and stilettos. So I danced the night away to redone gay 90's classics ("You've Got to Show Me Love" - another one of life's little jokes) and even showed the little Russian girls some Miami ghetto moves for their amusement. All while having an out-of-body that somehow this place should have more ghetto music, elbow throwing, and leaning back - more Miami.
All in all, I recommend both places. Crystal London is fantastic, but in order to truly enjoy all of it, you have to first visit Crystal Miami.

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