Wednesday, September 10, 2008

I will MAKE you like me!!!

I hate to pick on Palin, since she's a female, and ultimately that means she bears little influence over the public arena, at least in our culture. And I like women more than men, since I am one. However, this person is actually a nightmare for all other women and gays out there; sort of a mixed bag of horrible and backwards: anti-gay, anti-abortion rights.
For instance, here's a newish one: her church promotes gay conversion. For all you out there who haven't met anyone from these church groups, I will let you know that they are scary, deluded people who want to force homos into holding hands in a romantic manner with churchgoing straights. I blame them alone for the perpetuation of HIV/AIDS infections (due to ignorance and secretive love affairs), and for making many middle-aged divorcees miserable when they find out that their husband spent the better part of their marriage at a leather club with a wiener in his mouth, or that their wife really liked his sister more than him.

Many years ago, I had a friend who was a converted gay and part of one of these churches, and I had the opportunity to ask him all about his experience.
The conversation went like this,
I said: you're straight now, how does that work?
He said: I'm dating a girl who goes to my church.
I said: are you going to do it with her?
He said: we go on group dates, and we haven't kissed yet.
So, I said: how long have you been "dating"?
He said: like five months...
I was like: you're crazy dawg, no kissing? And how do you explain those three years with your ex-boyfriend?
He said: It was just weakness of the flesh.
I guarantee that when he's alone, he's not thinking about his woman friend. He's thinking about George Clooney. Let the gays be gay, please.

7 comments:

Unknown said...

scissor a bitch already

EAT said...

"LOL!!!," bitch. This is where I wish I could cue really sarcastic laughter- har he haw herr he har. Stupid.

Unknown said...

muffdiver > snatch-lapper
?

Anonymous said...

Please don't hate on George Clooney...he's just dreamy!

EAT said...

marco: No, No, NO.
TROCH:Funnily enough-- I was on your couch watching O Brother, Where Art Thou, what, 2 weeks ago? I fell in love with Clooney all over again at that moment he starts pretending to sing Man of Constant Sorrow. He is too sexy, and I guess that is why both teams are so hard up for him. Is he, or isn't he? Well?

Anonymous said...

He is! What straight man in their right mind has a mansion in Lake Como by HIMSELF? Last time a bachelor had a sweet house like that it was called the Playboy mansion...reminds me of Travolta stories of Travolta's little hideaway ranch...oh, brother where art thou indeed! where everyone can see you...

Anonymous said...

does he have to spell it out? clooney is clearly gay.